my boys

They fell asleep while watching tv last night.

our trip to Memphis

Benji had depositions in Memphis this week, so we went with him. We stayed at the Peabody Hotel. It was neat to see the ducks and learn the history of the hotel. While we were there we ate some awesome ribs and sausage from Rendevous. I also bought an $8 strawberry margarita on Beale street that was strong enough to knock an elephant out.
the day he FINALLY took a nap!

on the rooftop of the Peabody hotel...going to see the ducks

family shot...self timer...facing the sun...

all the kiddos

We had Grant, Gavin, Myles and Jessica's two girls Aubrey and Charlotte over the other night to play in the water. They had a blast outside! Afterwards we gave them all showers, fed them and then got them ready for bed. I think the kids (and the moms) slept good that night

Crazy boys...

Benji has been out of town this week, so Melody and the boys came up to stay. Gavin and Grant have actually been playing in Grant's room a good bit of today. It's so nice to have some quiet time. Don't get me wrong, I love watching him play, but sometimes quiet is good too.

It's been a week since we found out the babies passed away. I have felt so anxious and sad all day. I keep telling myself that it will get better with time. I know that it will. It has too. I know that God will bless us again very soon...hopefully with twins again, but just healthy is all I really want. I know it's crazy to want twins again. I never thought I really wanted them, but after learning we were going to have them we both started really getting excited about a twin pregnancy. I would love to feel that excitement again.

this really sucks...

OK, I decided I'm going to use this as a way of getting all my feelings out...kind of like a therapy I guess. I'm passed the point of sad. I'm mad. I'm mad that I'll never get to know if our babies were boys or girls. I'm mad that I'll never get to feel them move, get to hold them, get to hear their voices, or watch them grow. I'm mad that Grant will never know them. I don't understand why God would allow us to get pregnant with twins and then take them away from us. It seems so cruel. I know I'll get past this, but for now it just hurts so bad. We have a follow up appointment with my doctor on the 8th. I'm hoping that he will have some information about what he thinks maybe happened...anything for us to know and try to help understand what went wrong. Please keep us in your prayers. I need patience and peace and understanding. I need to know how to cope with this. I hate that this is the second time we've lost a pregnancy. I hate that we have to feel this loss again. It's not fair.

our twins passed away

During our second obgyn appt. today we saw on ultrasound that both our babies passed away. The doctor said that when it happens in the first trimester there are tons of reasons why, but they are all based around the development of the babies. Something went wrong during their growing process and so it stopped. I will be having a d&c in the morning. Please keep us in your prayers as we go through this difficult time.

playing at the pool

I decided to take Grant to our gym pool today. This is the first time he's been to this pool this summer. He had a good time and we stayed there almost 2 hours!! He didn't want to leave!